"You've Been Weaseled"
As October drew towards its end, the leaves reached their peak colour
and passed it. Much to the delight of certain residents, Halloween would
soon arrive. It was the Monday evening before the haunting night. Wilde
and Wilder, our valiant but mischievous weasels, sat at their dining
table. They had just finished a big dinner and were smiling devilishly
at each other. This was their favourite week of the year. This was the
week when they got to play trick or treat on everyone — legally. When
their tummies were pleasantly full, such as now, they did their best
scheming. They had created a long list of potential “victims” and now
were making the final choices. So far, the frogs and ducks were the
winners or losers, depending upon your point of view.
Wilde was more serious about Halloween than Wilder. He felt that the
holiday presented an opportunity to sharpen their planning skills and
have fun at the same time. Wilder just wanted to have fun, and this
Halloween would be the best ever. He just knew it!
After an hour or so, they were satisfied with the trick list and looked
forward to the morning with great anticipation. They would go to bed
early as they needed to be up before dawn. Wilde turned down the oil
lamp on the mantle, and each retired to his bedroom. Wilde lay on his
bed in the dark, still thinking about the details of their tricks.
Wilder tossed and turned with nervous energy. Eventually, they both
Two sets of beady eyes and two wet noses just broke the surface of the
water in front of the hut. It was 7 bongs and barely light out. The only
sound was the lapping of water against the nearby dock. The weasels
waited patiently. Eventually, the door to the hut opened, and Grenby
greeted the morning in his red and white striped pyjamas with green
bathrobe. He stretched and looked around. All quiet. Good, that was how
he liked it. He studied the sky and trees. It didn’t take long for him
to create a forecast. He predicted that today would be fair, cool, and
with light winds. It would be the same for tomorrow.
He walked to the flagpole and pulled on the rope to lower the flags from
yesterday’s forecast. Two sets of eyes followed his every move. Next to
the pole was a rack of flags that could announce any forecast he
developed. Blue-blue-purple would be the flags for today and blue-blue
for tomorrow. He removed some of yesterday’s flags and replaced them
with the blue and purple ones. Slowly he hoisted the new forecast up the
pole. Done! He walked back into his hut and closed the door.
In order for the weasels to put their plan in action, they would have to
remain unseen. They were counting on Grenby going to the lower level of
his hut. This was the time of year that he prepared that level for his
The weasels were right. They snuck out of the water and crawled over to
the flag pole. Wilder pulled down the flags as Wilde selected new ones
from the rack. They had their own forecast for today: Heavy snow,
moderate winds, hot — white/black-green-red. Grenby’s forecast was
quickly replaced. They were giddy with excitement. Then, they scampered
behind a nearby tree and waited for the fun to begin.
The swans were also up early and quickly noticed the odd forecast.
Remember, they are responsible for hoisting the same flags on the island
Sean Swan exclaimed, “How can it be hot and snowy?”
Stoddard laughed, “Grenby probably got his flags mixed up.”
“If he did, it will be the first time,” replied Sean.
That was true. Grenby was very careful about not making mistakes. He
took his forecasting responsibilities very seriously.
Stoddard said, “Let’s fly over there and see what’s going on.”
When they landed in front of Grenby’s hut, they were not alone. The
squirrels and moles had just beaten them there and were banging on his
Grenby eventually opened the door.
“What’s all the commotion about?” he yelled. “Can’t an animal get some
Sedgewick pointed up at the flags and said, “Look!”
Grenby looked up the pole and almost went into shock.
“That isn’t my forecast!” he yelled.
The weasels could barely keep from laughing out loud.
“Someone has changed my forecast,” he said as he looked all around.
Stoddard was the first to figure it out.
“Grenby, my friend, it’s Halloween week, and “you’ve been weaseled”.
Some of the animals laughed but not Grenby. He put his head down and
shook it. In all his years this had never happened before. When Wilde
and Wilder heard, “You’ve been weaseled,” they started rolling on the
ground, laughing uncontrollably.
Everyone saw them. Some yelled, “There they are! Let’s get em!”
Wilder said, “Uh, Oh.”
The weasels ran as fast as they could into the woods and disappeared.
There was no point in chasing them. What could be done anyway? Grenby
fixed his flags and guarded them all morning.
The following morning, the weasels arose very early again and swam
across the pond to the island. Their destination was the ducks’ raft.
They found it rocking gently on the water. The raft was moored to the
dock with two ropes, and there were extra unused ropes available for
other purposes. The weasels had another purpose.
Wilder grabbed one of the ropes and swam under the raft. He attached one
end to a hook on the raft and the other end to the dock. From above the
rope couldn’t be seen. Now, the weasels went under the dock and hid near
the water’s edge. They waited.
The ducks had a lot of deliveries to make that day as the swans had
nearly filled the storage shed. At 8 bongs they came out of their
cottage and began loading the raft. The weasels snickered from
underneath the dock anticipating the fun. It was cold beneath the dock,
but if you were in the trick or treat business, sometimes you had to
experience a little discomfort to enjoy the rewards later. Wilde and
Wilder were more than willing to do this.
It took about a half-hour for the ducks to load the raft. They were
ready to begin the deliveries. Four of the ducks got into their
harnesses. Devon unhooked the ropes holding the raft, or so he thought,
and got into his own harness.
“Everybody ready?” he asked.
All answered, yes.
“Yo,” he said, and they started paddling. The raft moved about a foot
and then jerked them backward.
Deirdre yelled, “What happened?”
Devon said, “Let’s try again.” Same result.
“I’ll find out what the problem is,” said Devon.
It took about a minute to get in or out of a harness. That was plenty of
time for Wilder to unhook his rope and hide it behind a pier.
Devon swam under the raft and checked everything thoroughly. Of course,
he found no problems. Odd, he thought as he went back and got into his
“I don’t see anything wrong,” he said. “Let’s try again.”
As you have guessed, Wilder reattached his rope as Devon was getting
into his harness for the second time.
“Yo,” said Devon. Same result.
Now, the ducks were getting frustrated, and the weasels were getting
silly with giggling.
Devon climbed out of his harness again; Wilder unhooked the rope again;
Devon found nothing again.
For the third time today, Devon harnessed up. For the third time the
raft was not moving.
Wilde and Wilder climbed out of the water and onto the bank.
Wilde said loudly, “Good morning everybody. How are things going?” Both
Devon turned and said, “Good morning. There seems to be something wrong
with the rrrr.”
He saw them laughing.
Wilde said, “You’ve been weaseled.” And off they ran.
If you recall, the frogs have two entrances to their cottage. There is
the normal front door and a second entrance underwater. That presented
the weasels with an interesting opportunity for a trick.
On Thursday morning, the weasels hid in the woods behind the frogs’
cottage and waited for them to leave. Then, they slipped into the pond
and entered the cottage by the underwater entrance. They brought four
long strings with them.
Much of the frogs’ cottage was like an indoor swimming pool. Four large
lily pads floated on the water, one for each member of the family. The
frogs used them for sitting and sleeping. The weasels attached strings
to the stalks of each lily pad. They fed them down and out the entrance
and then back up onto the bank behind a tree. Each string had a coloured
tag on its end, so they knew which string was attached to which lily
pad. Everything was in place for the trick.
Later, towards evening, they returned. The frogs were now home and had
finished dinner. Wilder peeked in a side window and saw that they were
relaxing on their lily pads. He noted which frog was on which pad and
told his brother. He crept back to the tree where the strings were.
Wilde went to the front door and knocked. Fionna answered and invited
Wilde in, but he remained at the entrance. He wanted to stay there so he
could signal Wilder.
“This is just a quick visit, so I won’t come in,” he said. “Hello,
everybody. Some of the animals say they've seen a hawk flying around
again. I wonder if you might have seen anything?”
Wilde saw that Finn was sitting on the lily pad that had the red tagged
string. He lifted a red tag out of his back pocket just enough for
Wilder to see it.
As Fionna was about to answer, a loud splash and yell came from the
pool. Wilder had quickly jerked the red tagged string. Finn’s pad sunk
instantly, throwing him into the water. The lily pad popped back up
quickly, so it looked completely normal. Finn did not! Now, frogs love
water, but they prefer to decide when they’ll get wet. Finn had been
shocked and had no idea how he got in the water. He climbed back onto
Faith laughed, “Finn fell out of bed like a baby.”
“I did not!”
“Then, how did you get in the water?” asked Faith, still laughing.
Finn looked around but had no answer.
“Children, please,” said their mother.
Wilde tried to keep from smiling.
Fionna turned back to Wilde. “As I was saying, we…”
Splash! Splash! “Yeow!”
Finn was in the water again. “My lily pad sunk,” he cried.
“It did not. It’s right there next to you,” laughed Faith.
Their father was watching with his own amusement as Finn again crawled
back on his pad.
Fionna turned back to Wilde again. “I am sorry for the interruption. The
children are usually better behaved.”
“It’s quite all right Mrs. Frog. I do understand,” sympathised Wilde.
Splash! Kerplunk! Splash! Splash!
Now three frogs, Finn, Faith, and their father were flailing about in
the water. Even Wilder could hear all of the splashing and yelling.
Sinking The Frogs
Wilde started laughing out loud. Fionna looked at him.
“I’m sorry everybody, but ‘You’ve been weaseled’,” laughed Wilde.
He left the cottage quickly. Fionna stood there with her mouth open.
Wilde joined Wilder, and they ran into the woods. Wilde told him about
everything that had happened in the cottage. It was a very successful
“You pulled the strings at just the right times,” Wilde said.
“Thank you, brother,” responded Wilder laughing.
As they walked from the woods near their cottage, their mood changed
Standing in front of them was the same hawk that they had driven off
last month. This time he was not alone. To his left and right, were two
more hawks, even bigger than he. They had not come for tea.
“So we meet again,” snarled Wilder, immediately taking the offensive.
“We have unfinished business, I believe,” hissed the hawk.
“Apparently, we do. We thought you learned your lesson the first time we
met. I guess you’re more stupid than you look,” said Wilde.
“Can’t you count?” asked the hawk as he nodded to his partners.
“No, actually, we can’t, but that doesn’t matter,” answered Wilde.
“And why is that?” spat the hawk.
“Because, no matter who wins this fight, we’ll make sure that YOU will
As he spoke, he pointed directly at the hawk to add emphasis. Both
weasels stood as tall as they could, teeth bared, and saliva dripping.
“Now you have two choices and only two. Choice one: your group makes the
first move, and YOU lose. Choice two: your group leaves now, and YOU
live,” snarled Wilde.
This situation was a classic example of an opportunity to win the battle
but lose the war. The hawk correctly calculated that he had the superior
force and would probably win the battle. Was he willing to risk his life
to win the battle? The answer was, NO!
He stood there and said nothing. The other two hawks looked at him. Time
“I see you’ve made your decision,” said Wilde. “Tell your friends that
they can leave now. Their services are no longer needed.”
The hawk thought a little longer and then motioned to the others. They
immediately took off and flew north.
“Good,” said Wilde. “Now, we don’t want to have to keep repeating this
scene every month. You and your friends can find plenty to eat in the
wild woods without bothering a civilised community like Ballymore.
Everybody here sticks together, and we protect each other. As you can
see, we are not easy pickings. If you come back again, there will be no
further warnings. I hope I am making myself very clear!”
The hawk simply stared at him. Then, he took off and quickly disappeared
to the north, also.
“Well done, brother,” said Wilder.
“Thank you,” said Wilde. “I think we are finished with them, but we are
not finished with Halloween.”
“Yay!” said Wilder.